~ Housewife, anyone? ~

Wallaaa...wondering where have I been...here is my story to share since I am officially a HOUSE WIFE now...

Ever since I was growing up, I slowly accepted the idea of being a housewife after getting married or having a child. This scenario is very common in this developed country although women continue working after gave birth is increasing. Coming from a country where education is seen very important in order to get a good job, it shocked me that most women who resorted to being a housewife are very educated, even up to degree or master degree level (which I am among them ).

They are up-to-date and do not feel any inferior compared to working women. If they have extra time when their kids are at school, they can always have chit chat in a cafe with other housewives or work part time. Most of them are internet literate, read books and very professional in raising their own kids and managing their own house. I hardly hear any of the mothers raise their voice to their kids, what more to beat them. Most of them can cook, sew and do other house chores naturally and they seem very happy. Furthermore, they are respected as the same as other working women.

Shifting perspectives generally to my home country, Malaysia, this is rather peculiar. Once a woman is educated, they are expected to be a career woman. Earn their own income. Have some independence and should have enough to help their parents and siblings who are still schooling. Their parents would cry blood if their educated daughters quit their jobs and being fully dependent on the husband. Every cent the parents invested in the daughter's education would be seen wasted if their daughter decided to be a housewife. If the husband is encouraging his educated wife to be a housewife, the husband may be accused as ruining their daughter's bright future. A housewife is still a housewife. You will be downgraded to a lower social rank, unless you are a wife of a CEO or someone like that. Is this a correct thinking that we should hold on to?

When I was working, many of us working women complained about how things are. They are stressed at work, working till late and yet have to manage house, kids and husband too. Even both husband and wife are working, the wife is still the queen of the house. The house chores should be wife's responsibility. The husband will help if they like. Some are lucky or unlucky to have a maid. If that is the case, they have to deal with maid's problems as well. Some maids could even bring more problems than solving them... from abusing your children, stealing your stuff and up to stealing your own husband. Same goes to kids. Mothers are still expected to take care of their children's well being and education. Fathers decide and get to know the results. Sometimes it is just too demanding to divide a weak female into too many major roles. But what choice do we have? Most households cannot be supported by husband's single income.

Though we women complain about this, when given a choice whether to continue working or being a housewife (provided the husband is able) , many would choose to work. Why? It is too tiring to do the house chores 24/7. Some even do not have the skills to do so. They were busy studying and were sent to boarding school since they are 13. How do you expect them to know how to do house works? Working is such a good escape from being with the children all the time. Again, this is too stressful and exhausting. Therefore, by just giving birth and let the babysitter, grandmother or maid take care of their children is such a great solution. Seeing the children at night after coming back from work or during weekends is not that bad. All you know is that they have enough money to spend, you enroll them to as many classes as possible and you just check the end results. Simple, isn't it? So here we go, it is a no-no of being a housewife.

Apart from that, having to earn your own money, at least working women do not have to ask their husband's money to buy new clothes or things they like. Some fortunate ones, there is no problem there. The husband will provide anyway. But most of the time, this is not the case. You have to beg or even save your own money to buy stuff for yourself. Who would want to let go such freedom? Why do you want to be at home, sweating and stinky doing house chores when you can go to work in an air-conditioned office, wearing smart attires everyday. Again, less attractive to be a housewife.

At work, more and more women could climb the corporate ladder. This is never the case in Japan, believe it or not? It has always men to be holding top positions. So women in our country are much luckier. But are we really lucky? Imagine this. You are one of the upper management people. To be there, you must have sacrificed so much especially your time with your children, husband, family and even friends. You win greatly in one part, you lose a lot more on the other side of life. Your children may have problems due to lack of attention, your husband may be seeing some other girl and the like. Some even have to suffer from illnesses due to hyper stress. Again, responsibility as a mother and a wife are expected to be no less. So are we really lucky then? When women have more chance to hold top positions, more men will have to settle with lower level in an organisation. As a result, man could not earn or provide as much to the family and situation forces the wife to work too, sacrificing more on the family value. Is there any way to correct this? Or is this wrong to begin with?

Being 100% dependent on husband is somehow scary to some women. Especially to those who have been working before, who have had freedom of earning their own income. Why is that? There is a fear that when the husband is already shifting their eyes to younger and more beautiful woman and need you no more, you have no where to go.(This is getting more common now). Fuh... what a dilemma! But to think of it, we should not think of it. If we think like that, more than 50% probability it will be like that. Are you with me? Your life is how you see your life. What we should think is how to give your best as a mother, as a wife. If things really happen, then it is a challenge for you, written by Allah to test how strong you can be. After all, if you are educated, it should be no problem to start a career at any point of your life.


So, housewife, anyone?

I always have considerable degree of respects for a housewife. To me, they are very very lucky and tough women. But, having written this, I will still think twice to be a housewife... Uh-oh.. :p

~ Moments with Halligans ~

June 1st, 2007 is where I was part of the Halligans. Just before I graduated, I have eventually secure myself a job with one of the leading construction and interior design company called Jim & Hall's (JHM). With their HQ based in Singapore, our local office is now located at Wisma UOA II, Kuala Lumpur. Yet before this office was officially open, I have been experience a working environment in a SOHO Office.

As time passed by, JHM grew and expend to the said new office and most of us was very much happy.

~ myself, Kaslinda, Bro Isa & Jason ~

Then I had a chance to participate in the organizing of the Regional Meeting in Kuala Lumpur. So much memories and valuable experience that I will never forget.

~ 3rd Regional Meeting and official launch of KL Office ~

~ Mok Thye Wai & Ignatius Tan (founder) with Louise Leong (Country Manager) ~

~ Door gift which was imported all the way from Singapore ~

~ Jason, Kaslinda, Masrohimah & myself ~

~ Us and the neighbour ~

~ The whole regional team of Jim & Hall's ~

~ the Malaysia Team ~

September 5th, 2009 will mark the last day I will be serving the company. End ed as a Finance Executive makes me very much happy with all the knowledge that I gained.

With the new chapter ending now I have to create another new opportunity using all my experiences and ability. To all bloggers out there wish me luck and wait for my new news upon my new advanced career.

To my hubby, I would like to thank you a trillion for all you advice and full support upon my decision.

Love you always sayang!!